milanesa con fideos…

why is it that sitting at a table feels so much more productive and promising? i feel like i could write a novel (i couldn’t). we don’t really sit in chairs in this household. i’m not altogether opposed to the concept of sitting on pillows, but now that i’m seated at the kitchen table with a plate containing the remains of my formidable dinner, typing away on my máquina, water boiling for tea, it feels like i’ve been missing out on something.

so i guess i’ll just sit here more often.

still feeling pretty wonderful. a lot of pent-up creativity churning about, not quite sure where to direct it yet. although it was lots of fun playing music last week, i don’t want to get high hopes or force anyone to be in a band with me. still feel like playing alone is lackluster. it’s felt like trying to get pregnant by masturbating. but i’m not hopeless, immaculate conception er sumthin, you never know.

i’m making a scarf. i might be allergic to the wool. i’ll try not to think about it…

i want to start a queer burlesque troupe.

antonio is becoming a man-cat.

i’ve been reading lots for my queer theory class. it’s got me thinking a mile a minute. all the coffee doesn’t help. i didn’t drink any this morning. but by the afternoon i couldn’t resist.

i skipped my audio class tonight. sometimes it feels good to skip class just for the sake of skipping class. just for le sigh of relief when you realize you don’t have to get off your ass.

gonna watch a movie and knit. antonio at my side, playing with the ball of yarn. idyllic, no?

yours quite truly,

j

cooooooomooo

woah babies,

another straight edge spotting. it was one of those varsity shirts, you know the ones that look like a gym uniform, that said straight edge for life, with XXX in the middle of course. where do all these straight edge bros go to thrash? still unknown, but i think i’ve got a lead….

i’m for finally feeling like i’ve got shit going on here. it’s been lovely. not just that i’ve filled up my time so that i don’t get bored enough to get lonely, i feel like i’m doing so many of the things that i hoped to be able to do! so exciting. i’m gettin bufff and stayin supple, learnin how to better navigate audio recording software, just started a queer theory class this week! (gonna be raaad), playin music later tonight with some really amazing folks!!! fuuuuck. no lo puedo creer. so awesome.

i’ve taught two whoooole classes in 7 weeks. i had a great time in both. it makes me feel slightly like mary ciccarelli (not that that’s a bad thing, duh!), i use my hands a lot and knock things over and get really into what i’m talking about. ha. it’s good though, the students ask a lot of questions and participate a bunch. successes all around. i think teaching in this setting will prove to be a lot of fun, all the good stuff without much responsibility. 

ohh, so since it’s semana santa and all i’m going a lil bit out of the city to some nature preserve or something where there is a yoga center. it’s gonna be hippied out but i’m stoked! hangin out with some trees and a book, doin a lil yoga, talkin about chakraaaas. i’m just goin for the day on sunday with a bud of mine. should be nice.

ok, ima go play a bass that weighs a ton and makes me feel like i’ve got a sweet new appendage!! wink…

all the hugs and all the kisses,

j

starfish and coffee, maple syrup and jam

hey babes.

i don’t wanna be that guy that moves to another country only to start a food blog. but damn, i’ve been cooking so yummy this week. i finally went to china town and found a bunch of things that i’ve been looking for everywhere! so exciting. so in addition to the lemon bars and risotto and pastas that i made earlier this week, i made sushi last night! along with an amazing cabbage salad (thanks, taylor! thought of you while i made/nommed it). it was all veggie stuff, cucumber, sesame fried tofu, carrot, beets, and mango! out of control delicious. i even found sriracha!! that was the best find yet.

oh and right now i’m making apple banana pancakes. with yogurt and honey on top. maybe a little dulce de leche…

i finally found a shop that has fresh ground coffee, so i’m also sippin some of the good stuff. people say that the espresso/coffee here is good, but i’ve been hard pressed to find a good cup. i sound like such an american jerk…….

so i think i will have to put my chef aspirations aside soon, it’s looking like next week i will actually be required to do some stuff for my “job.” or whatever. i am gonna go into a high school and talk to some kids in an english class, maybe talk about music er sumthin. should be fun. sing em a country tune. play the fiddle. who knows.

i’ll also be going to the teaching training institute finally, the place i’m officially supposed to be a “language assistant.” i am looking forward to that. i’ll talk about grammar and dialect and i’m even gonna talk about race relations in the US in one class. should be really interesting. not that i hate the high schoolers or anything, but for whatever reason that makes me feel way more like the imperialist…going into public schools talking about how america rules! hahaha, fat chance.

well shucks, ima go eat these pamcakes and eggs. doin it up right. breakfast at 3 in the afternoon.

xoxoxox,

j

antonio está mordiendo mis pies…qué altibajos la vida nos da

today was a wonderful day. just precious  in these little ways, nothing grandiose, like aunts wiggling cheeks of chubby nephews-not like a gemstone, that would just be hyperbole and cheesy.

i wandered through some beautiful bookstores. i am on the search for the perfect book, i’ve figured out which one i want to read (obviously the hardest part), but i don’t wanna buy a new copy for big bucks. so i’m on the search for the perfect used one, with a little misterio. i found a second edition copy at this lovely librería a few blocks from my house. it’s run by an older frenchman, totally cluttered and musty with the muffled sound of a needle sweeping along a jazz record. it was 300 pesos. so the search continues. i think tomorrow will be more fruitful.

i finally walked into a shop that i’ve only passed by at night.  it’s caught my eye quite a few times with it’s impressive vidriera of vintage guitars. it’s tightly fit into a tiny shop with a meager collection of records strewn about. the owner quickly befriended me and invited me to drink maté with him. he introduced me to a magical guitar. better yet, it chose me. it was cream-colored, not white, with a hint of glitter in the finish, plenty of little chips in the body, far from a flashy instrument, but with much character. he proceeded to spin a yarn about this nameless creature, no maker, unique parts, not knowing any instrument quite like it, and he knew a lot about guitars. but i have my little sunburst midland guitar that i bought for 100 dollars, no use dreaming of mysterious magical instruments, someday my guitar will find me.

this evening, i made a delicious meal, tomato and sausage risotto with garlic bread. i had a friend over for dinner. we drank a little wine and then went out for helado. so delicious, dangerously close to my apartment. soon i’ll be spending more money on ice cream than my loyaler addiction, coffee. we had dulce de leche with brownies, fig, and something rummy.

my life does seem boring most days, but then i remember that i watched the sun rise on sunday and i got in a (very minor) accident in a taxi saturday night. i’m putting myself out there, fucking shit up. thanks to my sleep depravation i wrote a poem yesterday. something i haven’t done in years, or maybe ever. a poem never feels like a poem. i’m trying!  poco a poco…

this week is going to be great.

les extraño. and big hugs to all you lovelies who passed along kind words after my breakdown numero uno. it made me feel worlds better.

besosss,

j

ahora pasamos al aburrimiento

yeah so, i’m bored. it’s dumb, but that’s what’s going on. it’s easy to not be nostalgic and miss home and buds a lot when you’ve got stuff going on. this week has been pretty dulllll. therefore, i’m just an emotional ball of missing bloomington and all my wonderful friends and family. so i need to do a better job of asking people to hang out (i’m not doing a horrible job, i swear i’m trying!), but then i feel obnoxious, especially when it’s hard to read if folks are even stoked about hanging with me. argg.

so now that it’s been a month, the honeymoon is over, i need projects, i need besties, things that i can look forward to. i know i can be proactive about some of those things, but it’s hard when i feel like i’m going it all alone. particularly when it comes to music. i just don’t feel excited about sitting alone in my room strummin’ away on my guitar. it feels kinda like a bummer most days. so i need to figure this shit out. and how. i’m far from desperation, just a little exhausted at the prospect of it all.

there were good things that happened during my week, too! it hasn’t been all boring. i feel like i have a bunch of little connections that i want to look into, people i want to get to know better, etc, but it just feels overwhelming. some friends from my program invited me over for dinner last night and that was a bit of a lifesaver, cuz i was gearing up to have a mopey evening! we laughed a lot and ate ice cream. i need more of that in my life right now. straight goofin’. like go to my “happy place” (you’ll know what that is if you know what that is) while cuddling with buds and giggling. huyyy. homegirl could use that right now.

so moral of the story is, feel free to send me words of encouragement and/or love. 🙂 or really if any of you lovelies have any good ideas for fun stuff i could try and get into while i’m here, holler, you know like glass blowing or model airplaning building, something new i haven’t tried yet. something to spice up my life. whatevs. it feels good to gush. big missies.

todo mi amor,

j

p.s. “running up that hill” just came on in the cafe i’m sittin at. another little glimmer of hope…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wp43OdtAAkM

That´s love got to do with it?

TINA TURNER. thank you. this was the song i sang last night at karaoke at a lezzy bar. it was listed as ¨that´s love got to do with it?¨not a typo on my end. it was super fun. i went with a rad fulbright bud. she sang don´t speak. hell yeah. they had about 10 songs in english. i might have to practice my shakira ballads if i wanna go back. so whatevs, i´m really glad i got out of the house. it´s hard for me to motivate myself sometimes. i just tend to be super negative about the possibilities. like what cool people am i gonna randomly meet at a bar? but last night was definitely encouraging in that regard! i met a bunch of awesome argentine ladies and will hopefully get to hang with them soon! and the craaaaaazy part is that i met two sweet folks from dublin and it turns out i stayed with their cousin when i was there in 2009! woahhhhhh. small world. i love it. live for it. so good. so yeah, this week i´m gonna try and get out of my house before it´s already getting into the late afternoon….that´s my goal.

besossssss,

j

chix noodle soup and ginger tea.

i made a nice little chicken noodle soup. and some ginger tea with lemon. i´m not quite sure what the deal is but my throat has been hurting and i´ve been a little stuffed up. so i´m trying to nip that in the bud. this week has otherwise been quite nice. i haven´t decide if i´m just being a lazy ass or if i´ve finally gotten accustomed to the porteño sleep schedule. this involves (at least for me currently), waking up around noon, usually not later, but let´s say 11:45a.m. is my average. putzin´around, eating something, drinking coffee, and then getting out of the house around 2 to run whatever errand or venture i had (or hadn´t) planned for the day. then i come back, play with antonio, bro down some more, maybe talk to a friend or family type on the interwebs, work on some songs. start to get tired somewhere in the early evening (maybe even take a nap). make some food somewhere beween 8p.m.-12a.m. then if i´m feeling it, which honestly hasn´t happened all that much yet, hop in the shower, get gussied up and the evening begins. i´ve been getting to bed at 2a.m. at the earliest and went to bed last night at 5! sheesh.

whatevs. it´s not really all that glamorous. i am going out tonight though. friends should be getting here soon. we´ll have a little something to drink and head out sometime after midnight.

this is really boring. i don´t know what else to share other than the rundown i´ve been spewing out. but really things are quite good. i have a lot to look forward to. my pole classes are really fun and challenging and i´m getting super ripped and feeling good. i´m starting my class at the university on tuesday. i´m gonna play music with a friend next week, gonna play bass! it´s been a while so i´m super stoked to pick it back up! i´m a lucky one. lots of wonderful things starting to happen.

wish i wasn´t so cloudy-headed today.

big missies.

❤

j

sippin´fernet, thinking of yall.

orientation ended yesterday. it wasn´t soo bad. i can´t help but be a total negative nance with these sorts of things but everyone was really sweet and it was good to meet all the folks who are embarking on this thing as well. it simultaneously made me feel depressed and hopeful, maybe even positive. hmm.

i had a lovely day, getting back into the strange little routine i had developed before i was formally orientated. i went to a café wandered a bit around san telmo, my stomping ground, got lots of produce at the supermercado, played guitar for quite a while. it was one of those wonderfully exciting seshes, ended feeling excited about the song i´m writing and the possibilities for me playing music here. i´m sure i´ll be full of ups and downs on the matter.

i stretched and got buff in the afternoon and made a delicious smoothie. i finished reading the last unicorn. it made me want to cry and made me feel like i was 10. i wish something as good as that could have gotten a good wail out of me, the joyous kind. so good. empowering my witchy ways.

speaking of witch (ha), i have been reading runes for cecilia and a friend of hers. it´s been quite fun. hope to do more of that, develop mis poderes supernaturales.

i made a yummy puree de papas and some steamed veggies, carrots, broccoli, chard, etc. muy fresco. shared it with cecilia along with a fernet and coca. un día perfecto.

en fin, i miss you all and brag about how awesome you are.

besosss,

j

COLLEGE!

er sumthin. orientation started this evening with a fabulous city tour. oh my word. 4 HOURS of city bus tour. i do get along with a couple of the fulbright folks so i think that’ll make it manageable, but the next three days will involve lots of meetings and seminars and lectures. do i whip out the blazer…

no. i’m not gonna put on that profesh hat unless it becomes utterly necessary. definitely an interesting group of folks. some career trackin’ hard, others a little more out there. there are a handful of other folks who’ll be in the city for research grants so it’ll be good to have more potential buds in the works. we’ll see. i found someone to go to a lezzy bar with me. good deal.

ok. there were importante things to remember….

so i thought it would be pertinent to share a couple of things i´ve observed over the last few days…

argentine guy wearing straightedge shirt. alright, interesting. didn´t know that was a thing here. hopefully i´ll have more on the subject at a later date.

my favorite: BUTTMAN, a sex shop. the font was shaped like butt cheeks. please, visualize. seems to me like that translation doesn´t account for the fact that buttman is more likely to be a child´s idea of a scandalous insult than a man who enjoys a bottom. hm.

there was more. a ver. i had eggs benedict this afternoon. i couldn´t help myself. but never again (here at least). i feel like crap and i could´ve had a cheaper and yummier meal. i just want to swim in hollandaise sauce sometimes, which i might actually be doing later the way the tummy´s been churnin..

ok that´s all for now. it´s saturday. i think i´m going to a party? people are night owls up in here, i gotta get used to it.